The Conditioning

Today I was having a conversation with my mom who is teaching a visioning class in Baltimore.  We began to talk about how conditioned we are in our response to things in our life without of thinking of the result we will get from that conditioned response. Example, what would your response be if you looked into your wallet and there was no visible presence of money? Would you say that I am broke, I have no money or I can’t afford too? I would have said these exact words before I learned to change what I said. Yes, visually there may not be any cash in your wallet but are you broke? Is that the message that you want to declare for yourself? I can’t afford too? Again do you what to reinforce that message to your consciousness? Or would it be better to say, I always have anything I need or there is no lack in this world and therefore there is no lack in my life. It may seem far-fetched or sound like you are lying to yourself because clearly at that moment there appears to be a lack of cash in your wallet.

But let’s look at this from another angle. You look in your wallet and realized that there was no money but you decided to say change your response to the situation and say, although I can’t see the cash in my wallet right now I know that money is energy and I am energy therefore I have all the money that I need. Just from that statement alone you have changed your vibrational relationship in with how you perceive yourself and situation. You’ve changed your relationship with how you desire for money to flow in and throw your life. This doesn’t mean that we don’t continue to do the things that support us but from that statement a thought or vision could be born. The God spirit within us is always speaking to us, but we are usually unable to hear because of THE CONDITIONING, because of the programming. The poor stay poor and the rich get richer. These are only words that carry their own energy. All the chatter in our heads that tells us that we don’t have enough and never will. This is the language that we transfer into our reality every day by what we speak and believe about and for ourselves.

This verbiage can change. The language can be altered with a little consistent and diligent attention to what is said and thought. With only a few adjustments and instead of going upstream, we can flow with ease and grace downstream. By saying, I have all the money I need, money is always flowing into my life or as I circulate money, money circulates back to me, we alter how money comes to us.

I could give you at least 100 examples off the top of my head of how this has worked in my life. How did I do it, I simply changed my perception of a situation that would have scared the average person into throwing their hands in the air and run away screaming. Have you ever been in a situation where you felt like the earth had just opened up and swallowed you? Everything appeared to have bottomed out, for lack of a better word. In that very situation, I gave away everything I had. This is how I knew that it was divine.

At the very moment that my life was changing, a stranger to me was presented with his 3 girls. They were dropped off at his door with no warning. I’m not sure what happened and it wasn’t important, all I knew was the mother lost custody. He lived in a 1 bedroom apartment and was indeed a bachelor. He ate out every night and had very little in his apartment. I had enough staff in my apartment to supply a gourmet chef’s kitchen, sheets and towels and things for his girl and furniture for the bedrooms for all the girls. It was done. Anything else was given away to friends and Goodwill. We took what could fit in our car and headed to CA. 3000 plus miles away from our home. I just know that was where I was supposed to go. If you had asked me about living in CA I would have responded never. I guess it’s true. Never say never. LOL. Neither of us know anyone in Cali and only had a destination. We were going to give until we got to the ocean. This began the most incredible journey that I have decided I should share with the world. So hang on I will need to tell in several issues because it’s too much to put in my blog….

So hold on to hats you about to go on an amazing ride. My life…

Until next time,

Peacefully and gracefully unfolding,

Nkiru

Question???

I saw something yesterday that just made my head spin. I don’t usually get caught in all the media stuff but as a mom and woman I had to step back and say what is going on with so many women. As a woman & mom in the public eye wearing what I would consider appropriately suited for the bedroom, to an event, just made my sad. It seems that over the past few years some have taken the limits of decency to a place that I would say is appalling and indecent. I love fashion but where does fashion stop. When is there a line drawn that says this is enough. The saddest thing was she was with her husband. I know the image of her caused me to question the integrity of them both. Parents and public figures who unfortunately tend to set stands for so many, those that follow without consciousness and without question. My question, when did we sink so low in consciousness to parade ourselves around in such a manner. Yes, we have the right as individuals to express ourselves and maybe I don’t have the right to question what anyone wears, than the bigger questions would be, when do you as an individual say enough, this is too far. I have more respect for myself that this. Well I just hope someday the switch will turn back on.
Until next time…
Peacefully and gracefully unfolding

Finding my way!

Often there are times in life when I my feelings and emotions seem to over power what I know to be true. But over these past few years I’ve had to step completely out of the realm of feeling my way through life and trust completely on what I know to be truth. What I’ve learned is this, that knowledge means nothing unless it is used. I’m not talking about book knowledge, that has already been tried and tested over the years to be someone  else’s interpretation of what they believe in. It to is meaningless if not researched for myself to be truth and removed from just being useless head knowledge and put into practice. But the knowledge that I’m speaking of is that truth that we are each born with, but have somehow forgotten because of all the programming we’ve each gotten since birth. That not to say that the humane things that I was taught are useless. You know, not to still, lie, cheat, take advantage of someone, hurt others (with words or physically), except people for who they are and that each of us has a purpose. These are part of the universal truths in life. Beyond these beliefs there is a set of societal and cultural programming that has taken place.  What we should or should not believe in. Who we should or should not like and the best one of all is who should or should not live in this world with the ease and grace. That’s the one that has taken me so many years to wipe from my programming.

Why??? Why were we told that there’s only enough wealth in the world for a few and the rest of the world is not entitled to enjoy the best that this world has. Even today I look at all the beauty and examples of abundance, the stars in the sky, leaves on the trees, grass beneath our feet, flowers that bloom, the money that circulates around the world, gold, silver and all the precious stones. There is no lack only the thinking that there’s not enough. Some call it universal truth, Karma and or The Laws of the Universe, New Thought the list can go on. I seems to me that there have been some great teachers over centuries that have been trying to deprogram me, us from thinking that we are born here to suffer and dead without experiences the all that this life can offer. I am still a work in progress but what I can say for sure is this; I hold on to knowing that life is what we believe it to be. I change the way I speak about my life. No just rhetoric that you recite to convince yourself and secretly believe that life can’t change. You have to truly believe it from within, live it and most of all be grateful now. Yes, now! I’ve leaved that when I live in gratitude now and am happy now there’s nothing that can stop me from achieving the life I desire. It’s not a magic genie in a bottle or a clicking of the heads 3 times, although there were great examples of how we have everything we need within ourselves. It’s all about living in the moment and seeing all that I have to be thankful for. No, I’m not where I desire to be but everyday I see all that I have and am grateful for it. I changed my language and how I see and speak to myself. The treasure is always there as the one of my favorite books, The Alchemist teachers. The greatest question is this, do you believe it?

Until next time,

Peacefully and gracefully unfolding…

Nkiru

A New Day

There are those moments in life that I would say are memorable. On the other hand, I’d rather say it like this, life consists of many moments some of which have a lasting effect on your life and others moments pass by without us even noticing them. Those significant, momentous and lasting moments can change the course of your life direction.

For me many of those momentous moments didn’t always feel like some wonderful, fairy tale, skipping through a bed of roses type of event. Especially those that altered my course. The ones that made me take a long pause and say out loud, something has to change. All of them came like a thunderous bolt from Zeus himself. They were far more dramatic than the Disney movie plot where a beautiful melody plays in the background and some extraordinary, mystical person comes along and waves their magic wand and wipe out all the problems. Mines were more like surviving the “Hunger Games”. Were even your closest ally’s could turn on you and take your life. Because of that I learned to do more than just survive and be strong.

By the way, I’d like to meet the person who said being strong was a great asset. That is a bunch of bull. What they were really saying was is this: take on the problems of every one around you so that you don’t have any time or mental capacity for yourself. Get so burnt out and bitter that you don’t have any time for yourself; as you look around at all your efforts to help and support all the life sucking leeches and their recurring issues, only to realize that while you were putting all your own issues on the back burner they almost sucked all life and goodness from you. Than simply moved on without as much as a thank you. That was the moment that I said enough and became single-minded and focused on the direction that my life was taking me. That’s not to say that I lost my compassion for others, I just turned my attentions and efforts toward myself. I said Yes to me. It was time for I, yes I meant I, to make a radical change in my life. I call it radical because as the world round looked on I’m sure they all thought I had lost my mind. But in fact I found it. I began the process of uncovering my true self.

Truthfully, I exposed how totally unprepared  for life, my life, I was. I was well prepared for the life of being a drone, doing what was expected. You know, graduate high school, going the college, get a good job and work until I was ready to retire. Honestly, I couldn’t wrap my head around that either. I had too many questions that needed to be answered. Life constantly left me longing for something different and asking the age-old question, what is my purpose. This life of mine had to offer something greater than following the status quo. There had to be a greater purpose for me being born into the world other than getting a job, marriage (all the stuff that came along with that) a growing old. Don’t get me wrong, I’m speaking exclusively about my life and not judging anyone else or their choices. As I see it the world is made up of all kinds of people and what produces happiness for me has nothing to do with what creates happiness for anyone else. I only knew that that life wasn’t for me. Most of all I didn’t believe that any one person, place or thing was given the assignment, the responsibility to “complete” me. I had the sole obligation to figure that part out for myself. That’s not to say that being in relationship isn’t desirable. The key for me is to be with someone who is in harmony with me. Not a clone of myself, that would be way too much for the world and me to handle. What I’m attempting to say is, I chose to be patient for that someone that will flows with me and I them. We are communal people and as nature would have it the majority of us desire to be in relationship with others and to have that person that shines a bit more light into your world. They’re not the caretaker of our “hearts” nor are they responsible for our happiness. Asking someone to undertake that I think is down right unfair, nor would I want to relinquish that much control over me. Nah!!!! I got that. Just be my partner, friend and lover, I’ll take care of the rest.

Now, can I take a minute of your time and drop a few lines regarding the crap that help to create the false illusion of what life and love was all about. Those darn TV shows that we grow up watching and many continue to watch. You know the shows that last(ed) all of 30 minutes and the parents or couple had or have perfect great job. They live(d) in the best neighborhoods and all of their children, if they had any, all grow up to become the next generation of perfect adults. And issues or life shattering event was completely worked out in 30 minutes or in part two. Please don’t tell me that many of us didn’t fall for it hook, line and sinker. The fairy tales had come to life. I know I did, millions did. Only to grow up and find out that it wasn’t reality. Heck, I would have switched places in a heart beat. I won’t ask for a show of hands that would have done the same. I spent the majority of my 20’s and 30’s trying to recreate the illusion. Tried the marriage thing, great man but wrong person for me. Had a couple more long-term relationship and at 35 had my only child. She didn’t complete me either nor did she miraculously make everything better. To tell the true life got a whole lot more complicated. I’m just telling my truth. But she has been one of my greatest gifts and teacher. I would be lying if I said every moment was wonderful but I couldn’t image not having her as apart of my life. She helped me to finally understand so much about myself and my spiritually. Most important that my happiness was exclusively my  responsibility. That this journey was mine and mine alone and anyone choosing to take journey with me was just a passenger, riding along but on their own journey. Heck if  someday you look around a find yourself own that ride alone, that’s ok too. It won’t last forever. Nothing ever does.  It’s simply time set aside just for self. Most important, it’s perfectly fine to push a few off if you need too, lol. For me it was the only way to eliminate the all the useless noise. A few of you may understand  what I’m talking about. The fear mongrels. You know, the people who always have something to say about your choices and come up with the perfect solution for YOUR life as if your life is a television needed someone to come up with a story line. Darn it, even if you don’t have a clue you’re writing your own script so have fun figuring it out. Life is all about the journey that we’re creating for ourselves and we only get one chance, in this life, to make it the best that we can be.

So, don’t be afraid to silence the haters, close the door to fear, stepp out of the box and stop holding on to anything or anyone that sn’it added to your life. People aren’t expendable but it’s ok to say that this isn’t working for me or you and I release you to be your greatest and highest self because holding on to this would be selfish on my part. Love them enough to allow them to discover their true happiness. It their work to do and you do the same for yourself.

My journey hasn’t been easy. There have been quite a few bumps, potholes and a few earthquakes along the way, but it’s been worth the ride. Now everyday that I wake up I get to experience something new or unexpected. Only because it is what I expect. I’ve only just begun and I don’t think I’ll ever figure it all out, and that’s ok. I don’t think I was meant to know it all. That would mean I’m at end of this journey and I’m not ready for that. I’ve only just begun!

I AM that I AM….

until next time….

Peacefully and gracefully unfolding,

Nkiru

The World of Happy

I just published my first children’s book in a series called, The World of Happy: Happy discovers the Sound of Happiness. This will be a series about 5 friends traveling around the world sharing their joy with others. Although the characters in the book series chant, their motivation is to share their happiness, learn and share the faiths and cultures of others. As these friends travel from country to country they will encounter individuals encountering unique situations where each of them can learn more about each other and unite in sharing and spreading joy and happiness with the world.

This first book is all about how these 5 unique characters all came together.

But, hold on to your hats, I’ve  already began writing about their first adventure.

Thank you for your support. There’s one day of free Kindle downloads. Check it out and write a great review. The link is attached below.

The World of Happy: Happy discovers the Sound of Happiness (Volume 1) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1508516057/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_lX25ub0P6T888

Peacefully and gracefully unfolding,

Nkiru

Life in the wobble

As we all know sometimes life presents us with a challenge or two to over come. I am learning to not see them as challenges but look as an opportunity for me to put into practice, real life practice, that which I am learning and practicing in my spiritual life. I’m not implying that my sailing through this wobble with complete ease but I will say I’m am truly learning the practice of living in thanks and gratitude. I’m learning to great each opportunity knowing that life is working things out for my highest and best good, which is always my morning and evening prayer.

So, over the past few weeks a few things that most would call essential life tools have temporarily been removed. The removels have caused much to slow down or completely stop. I’ve been unable to blog, communicate at well or do a few other things without the assistance or kindness of someone else. What an opportunity it has been for me to see that life goes on, even without these comforts, and that I am very blessed. Blessed just because and by so many. This is the real testimony of life and my spiritual practice; remain in an attitude of thanks and gratitude, even when life seems to be in a wobble.

I have experienced this over my life, that during periods of growth and development, I’ve had to stretch myself beyond what I’ve known as comfortable. This means that I can no long remain in my comfort zone but must be willing to except things that are occurring in the wobble with the same heart as when life is flowing smoothly. It has been said, “it is easy those that you love but the true test is to love those that don’t desire our love.” So when life is smooth it is very easy to be in thanks and gratitude, the true test of the heart comes when one is faced with circumstances that bring challenges and discomfort to remain that same heart.

Mostly recently I’ve been reading about the life and teachings of Buddha. It is written in insorr The Teachings of Buddha, “Blossoms come about because of a series of conditions that lead up their blossoming… So, everything has its coming forth and passing away; nothing can be independent without any change.” The Teachings of Buddha, page 42, 2.

I am like the blossom growing out through the shell of a seed. To break through the shell, grow and blossom into a beautiful flower there will be times when I will have to endure changing conditions. I most continue to push forward knowing that in the end I will be a strong flower beautiful flower.

To my readers and followers Sorry for disappearing, you’ve never left my mind. Thank you for your support, things will be back on track soon. I may miss a few days but any opportunity I get I will continue my story.

Until next time….

Peacefully and gracefully unfolding,

Nkiru

Adamas

“People with deep roots always flourish, no matter what happens. These roots represent faith.(belief, practice and conviction). By making your roots as thick and strong as possible, you will be able to absorb good fortune and cause not only yourselves but also your families and all your relatives to prosper forever”, this a quote, except that in the brackets, from Shin’ichi Yamamoto. He is the current leader of the SGI Nichiren Buddhism. 

What a wonder way to live this life. To reach the point that I can maintain happiness no matter what as I continue to deepen my roots so that I can withstand any storm, gracefully and fully. This is my quest, not only for myself but I pray this for everyone. That anyone that truly desires to live free and fully attains this bliss. For I truly believe this is why we each have come to experience this life but with this life we also each have the free will to chose. I have chosen to continuously see each moment as an opportunity to reaffirm my happiness as I grow in wisdom, truth and understand. As I continuously reach to shared what learn with those who are available to hear.

To become as the diamond, adamas, unconquerable and invincible. Adamas is the Greek word from which diamond comes. To become diamondlike, unmovable through any contrast that arises, able to withstand the pressure and emerge with brilliance and beauty. To be indestructible as I continue to evolve, refine and explore all that I am.

So, as I move closer to becoming diamondlike in conjunction with establishing deep roots I am growing into that which I am wanting to be. I am manifesting as my deepest desire. I know that as I become more refined and rooted I not only create prosperity and well being for myself but for the world around me.

This is the message I hear so clearly. Become that which you wish for oters to be. I have to be the mirror that reflects the love, strength and power that I desire other to achieve. To be a messenger of light, energy and love so that I effect the world in a positve and effect way. I will contine to deepen my roots and refine, polish and strengthen myself to become diamondlike, so that I am a help to others who wish to become their greatest and highest selves. This is how I achieve my deepest desire. This is how I move in my purpose and what propels me to continue to move with joy, happiness and peace during this and any period of contrast. “WInter always turns to spring, lay nun myoici.”

Until next time…

Peacefully and gracefully unfolding,

Nkiru

Freedom

This morning as I awaken to the sun shining on my face, I say thank you. Thank you for my journey and this life. For all the beautiful people that have come and gone. For for all those that have stepped on or cross my path. But most of all, I am thankful for being here, today. Freely and graciously open to all the good that my life contains.

There are many things that could consume me, if allowed them too. But I know, these things are just passing by as I am evolving, growing and renewing myself.  Because of this, today I say I am free..

Freedom doesn’t mean I’ve gotten all the materials wealth, acquired all the stuff, status, knowledge, relationships or ascended to some higher plane and live without any contrast. For me freedom means, no matter what, I know who I am. That I am not bound by the labels, conditions, thought or the ebbs and flows (contrast) of this life. That I am at peace within. At peace with who I am becoming and my journey getting here.

I had to going into that place within, that place where there is no definition of time, space or person. In this space I discovered being free. Unbound, not contained by anything. Where I discovered who is I AM. There are no borders, no labels to be, nothing to acquire because it all just is.

So I bring this freedom here, to this space and time, where I live and breath. I bring this freedom into my thoughts and desires, into each now moment and just breath in what is.

Yes, there are times that I look forward and backwards, only as a glimpse of… There are my dreams and desires, what if’s and could have been’s in this time and space, there are places where I want to be, things I desire to do. But within these projections, every thought and desire, my freedom has already come.

So I enjoy the journey. I find happiness along the way. For I’ve learned, life isn’t waiting to be happy once I reach the destination, it’s being happy on the way. It is knowing that where every I am, I AM. What every is happening, I AM and once I’ve reached that place, I AM. For, there’s always something else or somewhere else I’ll be wanting, so for me, I travel through this life know this, I am free.

Enjoy the journey because the destination is truly never achieved, life is all about the journey.

Peacefully and gracefully unfolding,

Nkiru

Stay in the moment

There are days that I could get catch up in the wave of emotions that attempt to flood my mind. Each of these emotional thoughts are fueled with tremendous power. On these days, before I’m fully awake, before I become fully awake in my body the mind has already started its rampage. It is attempting to take full control and direct my day. The mind is wanting to direct through its ego centered self.

It has taken some practice not to run go down this road. The road which could turn into me making a rash decision because I’ve neglected to keep myself in the moment. There are times when I’ve felt like break out into tears. If ever I allowed this floodgate to open, because I stopped doing this great work and returned to looking at my life unfiltered by knowing, I’d probably not be able to stop the river of tears. Yes, there are times that my minds has me on the verge of throwing my hands in the air and scream I give up. The intensity could over throw every thing that I know to be true. So, I have to stop the bombardment, the assault on my vibration.

This vibration, my energy field is not my ego. Not the mind and all that the mind efforts to protect itself from anything other than what it conjures up . It, the mind,  has its own agenda and if I pay much attention to its purposing I could backtrack and find myself back in another box. So, I am learning to say in the moment. I’m practicing being in thanks and gratitude all the time and doing this with real joy and not out of a sense of obligation.

It’s interesting that just the other day a young man asked me, “how to I deal with angry thoughts or doubts?” Just as his last word fell from his lips I replied, you change the direction of you thinking. For me I change my direction by thinking of something that makes me happy and smile. Thoughts, general thoughts, that generation within my joy. Keep it simply and keep doing it for as long as it takes to get the momentum moving downstream. Now, I can’t take credit for this wisdom, it was giving to me many years ago by M and most recently, I spent a great deal of time listening to Abraham-Hicks, Rev. Ike, Ralph Smart, Deepak Chopra and so on… Everyone of these great teachers speak of how our thoughts are the manufacturer of our reality. We are the co-creators of our reality. Therefore, what we think, the things we dwell on are what create our reality.

Therefore, when my mind ventures toward the rabbit hole, I have to recognize it first, then stop the impulse to follow the thoughts of the mind and turn myself within. What I’ve been working on for some time is this. As my body is waking up, coming back into this conscious state from sleep, I immediately turn my mind to thanks and gratitude. Even before I open my eyes I turn my thoughts of happiness. In doing this I can maintain my vibration, stay in my vortex. So that by the time I open my eyes giving thanks and gratitude has kept me moving downstream and not upstream against myself.

I can jump into the downstream momentum by appreciating the trees, the smell of flowers or simply give thanks for the breath in my lungs. Just being thankful that I am able to move with ease in my body and safely resting this nights. The key is to always keep these thoughts general. Keep them general, general and more general it is much easier to increase my propulsion in the right direction.

Once I am cruising in the right direction I turn to meditation. I take as much time available to me, but no less then 5 minutes to be still and quiet. (This stillness and quiet is quite different from the state of consciousness I was in upon waking.)  Practicing this everyday has helped me to redirect me towards, I AM. When I take time out of my day to be still and quiet I am giving time deliberate communion with source energy. We are never disconnected!

Just remember I said, recognize that my mind is the trailing off, falling out of alignment or running a muck and go into appreciation.

Here are a few that come to mind for me, right now. I appreciate know that everything is always working out for me. I appreciate being loved. I appreciate the flowers and all the beauty that they provide. I loving know that I am loved. I love being loved. I love cooking and preparing meals for friends and family. And as I continue to roll down this path, before I know it thoughts of appreciation just flowing.

Peacefully and gracefully unfolding,

Nkiru

Power of the Mind 🔇

I am sitting in my favorite place (right now) Starbucks listening to one of my favorite teachers, Abraham-Hicks, enjoying the falling rain. Where I live there is little rain so it’s presence is always welcomed and celebrated, at least by me.

This is my moment of reflection. Reflecting on this day and how it is the best day ever. The sound of the rain falling, giving life and nourishment to everything, seem to drown out all that was happening. Even at Starbucks I am able to obtain silence within myself. There was such bliss that I began to overflow with joy at how amazing it is to be here, no matter how things appeal to be. Life is wonderful.

The gift of this day, the rain, has brought a renewal and replenished that which has been missed. We are the co-creators of this world by all that we bring forth into manifestation. Therefore, I say, love our world and treat our home with gentleness and gratitude. 

For me, learning to release my expectation of how I thought things should be, an allowing myself to see beyond, changed my life. Now, I am not saying that I don’t have goals or desires which are every present in my consciousness. What I’m expressing is learning to remain in the present. Because in all that is time (the great illusion in itself) there is only this moment, right now. All else is just evolving.

Today I want to share a few affirmations that have helped me along the way.

So, quiet the mind, go within and be the observer of all the good all around.

I live in a state of love.

I speak positive and uplifting words.

I am connected to the unlimited and abundant universe.

I release all images of myself that aren’t in alignment with my infinite and limitlessness.

As I give freely I also receive freely.

I am a success and I allow myself to feel successful. 

Until next time….

Peacefully and gracefully unfolding,

Nkiru